#045: Good News? Bad News? We Don’t Really Know.
“Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?” — Abraham Lincoln
What is good news? What is bad news? We tell ourselves that we know, one way or the other, when something happens but we often really don’t know. A breakup can feel soul crushing and it can make you feel like your never going to have another good or happy day again. It can feel like not only bad news, but something that is life-altering and catastrophic. But a large majority of the time, that breakup ends up being a moment to learn from, to recognize what you’re looking for in a partner and a way to realize what truly makes you happy. Then when that next relationship begins, you are positioned to be a better partner and very likely have chosen someone better for you. Someone who might end up being a true life partner with happiness, marriage, kids and beyond. All of a sudden, the breakup that felt like terrible news not too long ago ended up being a blessing in disguise and something that you’re grateful for.
There are endless real life examples of this taking place, but not too many are more representative of this point than the story of Seth McFarlane. Seth McFarlane is the writer and creator of the TV show Family Guy, the Ted movies and many other classics. On September 11th, 2001, Seth was in Boston and had a late night on September 10th (the night prior). Waking up later than planned and in a panic, Seth rushed out of his hotel to head to the airport. When he got to the airport, he rushed through security, only to show up at the gate with the door already closed. He missed his flight. In that moment, it must have felt like bad news and something that was going to throw off all of his plans for the entire day ahead. But within an hour later, that same plane ended up flying into one of the World Trade Center towers in New York City, instantly killing everyone on-board. Missing that flight ended up being the best thing that’s ever happened to Seth in his entire life.
The same example can be given with the outcomes being reversed. A recording artist signs a massive record deal for 6-albums and feels on top of the world. Good news, right? Only to look back 2 years later, realizing that it was the biggest mistake in their career when the label shelved them and now they’ve fallen into a depression with having no ability to earn income and show the world their art/passion. Signing that record deal might end up being the worst decision in their life. We really can’t tell in the moment how any event will impact us over time.
Embrace this mindset in your day-to-day life as much as possible. Life is a roller coaster. Grieve losses and celebrate victories. That is the beauty of life and if we’ve been put on this planet, we should allow ourselves to feel in good times and in bad. But keeping in mind that we might not really understand the full impacts of any decision or moment allows us to stay closer to the middle. Do your best to not get too low with the low’s, or too high with the high’s. In fact, I think the healthiest mindset would be to look at great news skeptically and to look at bad news as a blessing in disguise. A reset moment to learn and grow from in order to create something better. This can be easier said than done in the moment, but the end result will lead to a more stable and fruitful life overall.
